Some wear their fears on their sleeve. We see their sweaty palms, pale faces, chatting teeth, rigid frame. Some are attacked in silence every day. Every night. Never free. Fear is tricky. On the one hand, it’s our friend m, right. It keeps us safe from danger. Reminds us what’s at stake.
But more often than not, it seems, fear is a liar. A foe to be defeated. Cruel. And it’s clever, that’s the problem. It’s powerful. It plays images in your mind that seem so real, you can’t even question it. The line between truth and reality is blurry.
It makes things we’re very capable of doing seem impossible with a few suggestive words and images, that they warp and twist into nightmares. Vivid colour, too. HD, 4K nightmares. You then can’t separate the nightmare-you from the real-you. So you deem it fact.
Fear is a plague. It spreads when we’re not careful. If we don’t catch it. You have to be formidable to spot it, face it, catch it, break its spell. It’s a process of a lifetime. A lifelong, terrifying exorcism of this demon we’re all born with. Just some people’s demons are bigger, and more powerful than others.
How to spot a demon/nightmare:
- Makes you not want to do what you always wanted to do
- You can’t stop thinking about the thing negatively
- Your sleep is impacted
- You live more in your head than in the now
- Your stomach feels unsettled
- You don’t want to look after yourself anymore
- Your relationships are impacted
- You can’t focus
- You don’t feel like doing the things you once enjoyed
- Your heart is racing and chest feels heavy
- Your thoughts don’t stop
- You want to run away
How to exorcise a demon:
- Force yourself to do anything that brings you to the present moment because fear doesn’t exist in this moment, it can only latch onto you and grow when you’re thinking of the future or lamenting the past
This is a lifelong struggle for some of us. I’m sorry. Some have more demons than others. But you’re capable of exorcising them. You’re capable of breathing again.
(Don’t worry, these daily summer posts are soon coming to an end! Last week of them now!)
Sincerely,
S. xx
S. R. Crawford 