Journal Entries · Lifestyle · Mental Health

How healthy am I? (Journal entry)

How healthy am I? I know for sure I’m healthier than I used to be. I eat better. I sleep better. I walk more. I have deeper more meaningful conversations. I create during my weeks. I stretch. I drink loads of water. I care for my hair and protect it. I notice my thoughts. I’m compassionate towards myself, like a big sister.

I don’t think i could quantify it really. But I’d say I’m not as healthy as I’d like to be. As my ideal dream self.

My ideal healthy self is more confident and actionable towards the things needed for a healthy routine. Regular high heart rate exercise of some kind, like running, cycling, gym, HIT, dancing etc. I would eat so much better, with more colour on my plate, and a larger portion towards veggies. Not as punishment but because it’s delicious and feels good. My skin would be better. I’d get sick less often. Much less! People’s opinions of me would matter much less. It would wash right off my back. I’d make decisions with more certainty because I feel a connection to my intuition and know my values to guide me. I’d be braver. I’d go on adventures. I’d commit. My body would stretch better because I’m being mindful and in the moment and caring and I’ve practice time and again. I’d be on my phone much less. I’d take meditative moments more often. I’d fill more journals with all my thoughts. I’d do a sport. I’d take more of an active interest in peoples lives.

So I’m healthy but not that healthy. I make mistakes. I play small. I shy away. I make poor decisions. I get jealous. I neglect routines. I forget to practice. I give in to a negative spiral.

But I’m human. I’m getting there. 

I want to be a healthy person. Why? To brag about it compared to unhealthy people? That would feel good but truly healthy people don’t do that. Not mentally and spiritually healthy people. To live longer? Yeah, partially. But mostly just to live better. Everything is rosier through a healthy lens. You feel stronger within and externally. You can conquer anything. I want that feeling, instead of feeling so weak at times. So defeated. So scared.

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