I was wrong

What I wrote on my blog two years ago is probably wrong. Some of it. Maybe a lot of it! What I’m saying this year could be wrong two years from now. Or tomorrow!

The point is, I’m wrong.

And so are you.

I hate this because I like getting things right. I like being known for my intelligence and advice and wisdom.

Oh wise Guru Siana, they call me.

But I’m not always right. I’m often wrong.

And that’s scary and it sucks but what if I told you that you can’t be right? Not about everything, and definitely not all the time.

You should be worried if you still agree with everything you’ve ever said. If you have the same beliefs as five, ten, or fifteen plus years ago.

That only tells me one thing: you haven’t really grown or changed.

I’m not saying our beliefs and ideas need to change drastically, of course. Going from being a devout Christian to being a Satanist is very worrying and probably means the opposite: you have no strong beliefs and are easily swayed into believing anything you come across.

It’s about having a growth mindset versus a fixed one. Learning as you go through life and adapting as needed. Taking on new information and implementing it into your life. Attuning your values, your ideas, your methods, your focus, your creativity, and so on.

A growth mindset means being open-minded and intelligent when you are interacting with the world.

One year (or month) you may be sure that weight training is for you. It’s the best form of exercise that you can do. The next you’re into swimming and you swear there is no better workout. Then it’s yoga or Tai Chi…

It doesn’t make you stupid, fickle, temperamental, gullible, or anything else. It just means you changed your mind!

It’s crazy how wrong this seems. Why aren’t we allowed to change our minds? To have different likes or dislikes; different opinions; different tastes; different beliefs; different ways of working; different styles; different values. As we get older, this should happen naturally, surely?

It’s not always positive, but that’s okay. That’s natural too.

We shift and change and grow and reshape ourselves thousands of times over. We shed our rigid skins and decorate ourselves with new ones.

This is often suited to our new environments, our age, our finances, our experiences, our family, our love life, our friends, our enemies (whoa), our health, our diet, our sleep, our entertainment, our education…and on and on it goes.

I think this is a message to my fellow perfectionists. A message to my fellow competitive people. A message to those who think they’re intellectually superior or holier-than-thou. We can’t be right all the time. When we are right, we can later be wrong for the same thing.

And the same things can mean something completely different in a different moment in time or a different place! Culture, societies, and eras, they all have an effect on what is known as truth or important or right.

So maybe we shouldn’t worry so much about getting it right.

Chill out, try new things, learn and grow, adapt, and change your mind. Don’t be afraid to think what you think, feel what you feel, and share it out loud. Have an opinion and speak it into existence (kindly, fairly, not random arrogant shouting into a void!).

It’s not embarrassing to be wrong. Okay, yes it is! But if you’re with the right people when you realise that you’re wrong, it shouldn’t feel like the end of the world. Hold up your hands, say “whoops” and accept it gracefully. Everyone is wrong sometimes. The more you’re okay with being wrong, the better your mental health, I believe. Because it takes confidence to make mistakes and self-correct humbly. It takes confidence and intelligence to be open about errors and learn from them.


S. xx

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